"Help Wanted? Please, Let Me Help!”

I had a thought this morning while I was looking through the online classifieds.

“I have become a professional jobseeker!”

Wow, you know, its unbelievable the skills you learn when forced to. I say this, because I know I can’t be the only one experiencing this life struggle on a daily basis. I know there are more of you. “I can’t be the only one! I can’t!”

Let me give you a little background about me, and my search for the perfect “Right job", or should I say the perfect "Right-Now job.”

I used to be considered a part of the Moderate-Middle Class of society, but, in a short time, have fallen to the Upper-Lower Class. I have been out of work since July of 2005; however, this was not by my wishes. Nevertheless, that is a whole other story that I’m still not clear about. Either way, the unemployment office saw it my way after the appeal. Since then, I have completed several event tours with government assistance programs.

This is the story of my ‘Tour ‘de Workforce’.

Herein is my account of the charitable journey I am on to keep thriving in time of desperation.

My first event takes me down that path to the state unemployment department, which gave me a good 26-week stint that I like to call, “Run for My Life.”

Now, one thing you have to remember, at least in my case, is that when you leave a position making 34k+ annually, you may not find a position right away making that same amount of money, especially if you didn’t have the good fortune to go to college.

NOTE TO HIGH SCHOOLERS: PLEASE GO TO COLLEGE!!! For your own sake, I don’t care if you major in the most off the wall subject you can think of, like Greek mythology or English Lit. It does not have to be relative to the job, just knowing you have that piece of paper, will get you the job over someone like me. On the other hand, even if you do not finish college, just go for a while. Many companies prefer some college over none, even though I have 20 years real world work experience, and 7 of those years in managing staffs of 6 to 45 people. Go Figure! Ok, well, that is my Public Service Announcement for today. Now, I should get on with my story.

During the “Run for My Life” tour, my physical abilities were starting to deteriorate more and more. Hence, I have renamed it “Running Out of Life”, seeing that it has brought me a bit closer to the other side.

My worsening physical abilities added to the emotional stress of not finding a job since I knew the tour would be ending soon. Left with no medical insurance for doctors or my, much needed, prescriptions, I was forced to go without medication for some months, which is not a good thing. And, please don’t remind me about COBRA. What makes this such a good plan? While I was working, I complained about how I have to pay almost $400 monthly for a family plan, through my employer, and now, after they asked me to leave their employment they offer me the ability to continue insurance at a rate of $800+ a month? Does anyone else see something wrong with this picture? This is the true essence of a benefit tour.


“I HAVE NO MONEY! REMEMBER, I DON’T HAVE A JOB ANYMORE!”


Finally, after much debate, my husband and I decided that maybe I should try out for the Triathlon of all events. So I applied for my Social Security Benefits, due to my conditions. I then decided that I would do the “Walk for My Life” tour, even though I have trouble walking I pushed forward. After all, I paid into this fund, and now I’m in need of money and medical assistance. Right? I mean, I have got to the point, that I can hardly walk, my legs and feet swell badly on a daily basis, I’m so depressed at times I don’t want to get out of bed, and I’ve gained more weight, on top of my already overweight stature, since I’ve been sedentary. I feel like me brain doesn’t function as well as it once did. And, if it weren’t for Suduko and other games to keep my brain challenged, I wonder were I would be now.

Keep in mind that this process can take about 4 months or longer to get any kind of answer to know if you qualified. So, I began the grueling task of filling out the application for SSI. I think it’s safe to say that if someone can get through the mounds of paperwork, one should be able to get a decent office job. It’s incredible what they put you through in order to get your minuscule monthly benefit. But, then you have to meet with them on several occasions and finally, they set up appointments with their doctors to test you. God forbid you are having a halfway decent day! Besides, the tests they do, and the questions they ask, don’t always verify the particular conditions you are experiencing.

The doctor I saw would ask me questions, and only wanted specific answers. He would not allow me to expound on my answer. He actually got irritated with me when I tried to go into more detail about some of my pain. He just didn’t want to hear it. Nevertheless, 3 ½ months into this, and with unemployment benefits gone 3 months ago, I received the long awaited letter that said I wasn’t qualified. How devastating was that. To appeal, you’re looking at a much longer march down the road, and then there’s the part about having to hire an attorney. “I can’t be the only one! I can’t!”

“REMEMBER, I HAVE NO MONEY!!!”

Now here’s were the other two events in the Triathlon come in. While engaging in the long march for SSI benefits, I filed papers with the county to get Medicaid and Food Stamps. Low and behold, you can’t get Medicaid without first qualifying for SSI. Wonderful! We still have no medical help to this day. Food Stamps are another dehumanizing endeavor where you need to read the fine print. We were able to get 2 months of food stamp, that’s all. Because my husbands’ income went from $8.50 to $9 an hour, we were now, Not Qualified. That extra $20 a week meant we would still be hungry. I don’t get it!!! “I can’t be the only one! I can’t!” I wish someone would explain to me the reason why government agencies go by your gross income, instead of your bring home when deciding if you make too much to qualify for benefits. They forget that they get to skim the bucket first, and what’s left are the dregs that you actually try to live on. This is the real money that we use to pay rent and electric, and buy food with, if we’re that fortunate to have anything left over. “We’re Hungry!” “I can’t be the only one! I just can’t!” What do we have to do, ask the boss to keep that extra $.50 cents on the hour, so we stand a chance to buy food with our food stamps next month? And again, God forbid he gets the occasion to get a little overtime. Well, that just cancelled the food stamps for the next month.

So, here we are almost homeless, almost without utilities, no food and no money. We’re robbing Peter to pay Paul. We owe every bodies brothers mother, and then some.

I know I sound angry. I don’t want to be, and I try to make light of some of it, because there are life’s lessons to learn and once you lose your sense of humor, you’ve lost the whole race. However, it is true, I am angry. I don’t want to be on the circuit anymore. I’m angry because I used to feel proud and I was worth something, and I felt others thought I was worth something. But, in a year and a half, my pride has been leaving me. I do have some hurdles in my way, like I need a sit down job, and a job close to home. We have only one old car on its last legs for my husband and me to share. That’s why he took a night job. Come on, “I can’t be the only one! I can’t!” I have applied to so many jobs, and read so many Help Wanted ads, that I wish that someone could “PLEASE, JUST LET ME HELP!”